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Radio DJ MaximumTacolord was an internet DJ on the Happy Fun Taco Hour. Our Happy Fun Hours had advanced so far beyond the Happy Fun of normal time, it took 3 earth hours to complete just one Happy Fun Taco Hour!
But we were too much happy fun for the man, so he took us off the air!

      Yo music junkies, I bet you’re wondering, “Tacolord, you are my sun and I am some sort of tree, how can I get a fix of your wonderful, wonderful sounds? So that I may grow really big and drop apples on people's heads?" Wonder no longer, Taco is online! Well, he already was, but now he’s online times two! Well, until Marquette's radio staff scapegoated him for some bull he didn't do and got him kicked out of the station.
      Let's move back a step. After defeating the station managers with the lasers and missiles of going to meetings and signing the agreement sheets to create the Super Fun Happy Hour(s) they sought retribution and prepared the perfect crime! First someone urinated into a bucket then they blamed it on me. With the only "evidence" available destroyed by those who punished me, they took away my air time in shame. Leaving me no way to defend myself, because there was never a crime to defend against! They gave back the show a week later after I kicked down the dean's door, alone with my army of loyal followers. Shortly after, I was reinstated as a DJ, I left the Jesuits for another school so I wouldn’t have to deal with Marquette’s lies anymore. However, since I put all this work into this page and I would one day like to bring back the Happy Fun Hours, I’m keeping the site up (also many of the Marquette faculty hated tacolord.com, making me want to keep it up more. They've actually told me so over the phone and in the classroom).
       Marquette's airwaves are only heard on the internet, the school once upon a time had a radio station, but it disappeared somehow. Some say the Orcs pillaged the station, others claim it had something to do with fire. I really enjoy the story about the priest and the intern having relations and selling the equipment to buy tickets to another nation to start their new life as African dictators.
       Regardless of whatever excuse I make up on the fly, the local rival school MSOE totally makes fun of Marquette. “Oh look at the Jesuits in training, look how they cannot speak on the radio. Poor little Jesuits! They are no match for our mighty engineer powers on the radio, hahaha! It looks like Voltaire was right!"

Well those suckers will learn their lesson soon enough! Here is how I see it.

Step 1. Get a time slot (10 p.m. to 1 a.m. on Saturdays) on an online radio station with a dozen and one fans.
Step 2. Figure out how to use the buttons.
Step 3. Make someone else do the button work, this stuff is hard!
Step 4. Make dollars upon dollars doing radio ads! I’ll be able to afford sweet, sweet energy drinks! Muwahahahhahaha.
Step 5. Abandon the station just after creating a large loyal fan base for a better job at a real radio station, with equipment that isn't outdated and faulty.
Step 6. Conquer the world and build my own bloody radio station to brainwash the masses (insert more evil laughter when affordable).

People ask me why don’t you just build your own station now? Are you kidding!? The radio tower alone costs like, 8 million dollars worth of steel to build! You know how big they have to be to send signals to Japan? Pretty freakin’ large. Check out the diagram.
                               

      Music- Here at Radio DJ MaximumTacolord’s Super Fun Happy Hour(s) we don’t believe in playing a single genre and thus we call ourselves genre hoppers. We’ll play anything that we like, from rap to hardcore Japanese mush punk! We’ll post playlists when Radio DJ MaximumTacolord stops being so lazy, it’s not like he is busy with many, many, pretty, scantily clad females! Really, he isn’t. It has been months since he even SAW a pretty female, let alone a scantily clad one.

      Humor- Here is the stuff Radio DJ MaximumTacolord brings to the table, creative original material between the songs you’d rather be listening to. Where most DJs annoy you with details about their life or prank calls. Radio DJ MaximumTacolord annoys you with things like Giant Invisible Ballerinas, Bubble Gum Fairies, and the Snow princess.

      Ads- Where massive radio stations make hundreds to thousands of dollars playing stupid ads about penis enlargement and porn, Radio DJ MaximumTacolord makes no money. He would, but the station takes it away from him. So if you wish to pay me, do so with sandwich pieces, my overlords have a distaste for the mayo.

      Other Stuff- This is the stuff I’m forced to do by Marquette’s Radio station. The usual, play their sweepers, read their cards, play some of their songs, and worship the pagan god known as X the Destroyer.

See that, that is the face of death, on cold night you may see X the Destroyer. However, it is likely hey'll just eat your ferns. I somehow doubt he has the power to really do much else. He might poop in your garden thanks to all that fiber. In the long run, you don't really have much to worry about. I don't know why anyone worships this guy.

     Promos- Basically ads which say how awesome we are.
Pants - What DJs are doing that you can't see.
Pink Orcs?- Are you prepared?

      Public Service- Here at Radio DJ MaximumTacolord’s Super Fun Happy Hour(s) we adopt kids no one loves and turn them into adopted DJs. We’ve already adopted two poor slobs that could never get a date and now, never will because they are tainted with the juice of Radio DJ MaximumTacolord. Those juices leave one stinky stain that haunts you for the rest of your life and into the next! Well, it wasn't like their life was going anywhere. Orphans are screwed from birth and are currently ignored by society and the other guy had an outtie belly button, what a freak.